Just as Agent 86 had his heart and mind focused on a specific intention, it is equally crucial that you motivate both your mind (what you think you should do) and your heart (what you value). It is difficult to examine your values, beliefs, and true purpose without a trusted partner such as a coach. Once you have explored with your coach what is really important to you in your life (career, family, community, your values and purpose), it should become clear what you need to do. Setting  goals then becomes a natural extension of your values.

Goals are very exciting and energizing. They drive us to achieve beyond our expectations. They make it easier for us to focus and concentrate, and give us permission to say “no” to distractions. Then dreams really do come true. But unless you spend time to explore, plan and prioritise, setting the wrong goals can lead to disappointment and disillusion. This saps your energy and motivation.

3 is a Magic Number

 If you have prioritised 3 areas or values in your life, you are ready to set your goals. Three is an ideal number, as more than that can disperse your focus and concentration. You should be prepared to spend time, money and energy on achieving these goals. Remember, goal setting is not for sissies! It requires sacrifice. You have to really want to achieve them and be willing to say “no” to distractions.  

If you find yourself resisting the process of committing to specific goals, then it’s highly likely you have an underlying fear of failure – or of success.  A coach can help you work through this obstacle.

“Out deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

 Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”

Marianne Williamson

Once your priorities are clear, saying “no” to activities which distract you, become far more important than saying “yes” to the myriad of distractions we are bombarded with on a daily basis. Clear priorities also make it more difficult for the “procrastinator” in you to take hold and sabotage your potential to succeed to the level you’re really capable of.

At this point you’re ready to cast those ideas into the form of a SMART goal. A SMART goal is:

S—specific

M—measurable

A—action-oriented

R—realistic

T—time framed

1. Be Specific

Be specific when you write down a goal. Narrow your focus. “Getting fit” is not a goal, but an outcome. “Exercising regularly” is not specific enough. Write down things like, “I am so happy and grateful that I feel energized, fit and vibrant as I ride my bike for 40 minutes four times a week (Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday).” Notice 3 things about how this goal is described that make it specific:  

1. It is stated in the present tense, as though you are already in possession of the goal.
2. It brings the goal to life by tapping into the positive senses of what it is like to be experiencing the goal.
3. It reinforces the feeling of gratitude which is an attitude known to greatly enhance the speed at which we attain and maintain goal- achievement

Don’t try to be all inclusive. Focus on making progress on two or three goals before expanding them. The more you can refine and define, the more specific you are, the easier it is to stay focused. Don’t forget to ask for the help of your coach. Your coach can send you email reminders and hold you accountable.

2. Be Measurable 

Write down your goals and their measures. You will need to track the minutes, the days or the number of times you engage in your goal behavior. If you don’t complete the originally defined time or measure, write down and acknowledge what you did complete. This will track your efforts and help sustain and encourage you when you lack energy or motivation.

3. Be Action-Oriented

Make sure the goal you write down is action-oriented. Simply, this means that your goals need to contain a verb, or action-oriented statement. For example, “I ride my bike X times per week… I save “x” $$$ per month… I attract x new clients per month

4. Be Realistic

Select goals that are realistic and motivational. If you know that 40 minutes on the bike or treadmill will exhaust you, or create stress because of the time involved in showering, changing, or other inconveniences, then change the goal to something easier and more attainable and pleasurable – like running with a friend. Make sure your goal is something you like to do. When you create pleasurable memories while you are engaged in the activity, then you increase your chances of doing it more often.

Some people find it useful to reward themselves after goal activity, as long as the reward doesn’t sabotage your goals.

“No pain, no gain” is also true in many areas of goal setting. However, if there is too much pain, you will not gain your goal. Make sure you are willing to pay the price of achieving your goal. By the same token, you need to evaluate and review your goals so that they are not too easy. If you are well on your way to achieving your goals, then you may have set them too low. Try stretching them 10 or 20 percent. If you are not on track, give yourself permission to reduce your measures by 10 percent.

Review your goals regularly and look at issues of alignment with your values. If you are not achieving your goals, you may have picked the wrong goals. People usually do what they want to do, and if you are choosing not to follow your goals, there is a reason that needs to be further examined.

5. Be Time-Framed 

Your goals need to be time-framed. There needs to be a beginning and an end. This would look something like: Have a fifteen percent increase in sales by the end of the year by increasing the quantity of pre-qualified client leads by “x”.   This should be tracked at regular intervals.

As you track your progress, ask for someone to hold you accountable. Research shows that it is easier to stay on track when you have support and reminders.  Executive coaches are trained and have expertise in this area. Ask for help. You don’t have to do this alone.

Reframe Failure as Feedback

The secret to dealing with incomplete goals is to reframe “failure” as “feedback”.

There are no failures. With the help of your coach, you can review without judgement and analyse where you have fallen short of your goals. This is where the real learning about yourself or your business takes place. The self-awareness that can be gained when you set a goal that you do not achieve is worth the price of admission.

But if falling short of a goal is a particularly negative experience for you, it can be difficult to see past the negativity and appreciate the real prize – which is the lessons to be learned from the experience. This is where a good coach can be an important part of helping you repair your bruised self-esteem and re-frame the experience of “failure” into a precious and vital opportunity to grow and improve.  With a coach, reviewing the reasons for incompletion tells us something about our true values, competing commitments, real priorities and gives us invaluable information about what really matters to us.

If  self-sabotage is the culprit behind a failed goal, therein is an opportunity to revise some of your “old tapes” or outdated assumptions and beliefs that are limiting the full expression of your capabilities and gifts. But rather than giving in to them, use your coach to explore them and to revise them into empowering beliefs.

Choosing and planning your goals is hard work. It takes time and commitment. The rewards, however, are great. By aligning your head with your heart you will set meaningful, attainable goals that will help you make progress toward what you truly value in your life. In the words of Earl Nightingale, the greater success lies not in the achievement of the goal itself, but rather…

“Success is the progressive realisation of a worthy ideal”

 D Worrall (2010)

References:

Cairo, J. (1998). Motivation and Goals: How to Set and Achieve Goals and Inspire Others. Career Press.

Mollicone-Long, G. (2007) The Secret of Successful Failing, Pathfinders Publishing.

Proctor, B. (2007) The Goal Achiever. Life Success Publishing.

Tracy, B. (2003). Goals! How to Get Everything You Want —Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible. Berrett-Koehler.

Worrall, D. (2009) A Climate for Change, Life Success Publishing.

Further Resources:

For more on goal setting, values and SMART goals see A Climate for Change (2009), D Worrall at www.aclimateforchangebook.com

For further information on Executive Coaching and Business Consulting for Leaders of Change, contact Di at Worrall Assoc. on enquiry@humanresourceschange.com.au

 

Corporations spend billions every year on strategic planning. They align their business goals and operations with their mission and values – their core reasons for being in business. Corporations may complete this exercise in-house or engage the services of an external Consultant who has specialized skills in areas like values alignment, cultural and business analysis,  and strategic planning. .

Executives and Small Business Owners  also involve themselves in similar planning sessions with their executive coaches. They examine their strengths and weaknesses with their coach, they look at their career and personal goals, and make strategic decisions about where and how to spend their time and energy.

Some coaches straddle the field of “executive coaching” as well as “life” coaching.. Life coaches do the same thing with individuals. They explore and clarify with you your identity, your values, and your true purpose in life. How can you know what you need to do, where you need to spend your time and energy, if you don’t know what is most important to you? This is difficult and important work. And it is hard to do alone. Taking the time to make personal definitions for yourself will make the process of goal setting and staying on track much easier.

Regardless of whether your goals are to finish a university degree, get a better job, start a business, buy a home, or lose weight, the process is the same. The aspirational goals you set must be consistent with your c ore values and true identity if you want to sustain your motivation over time. 2.

Here are three essential elements you must consider before writing down your goals:

1.            Examine your identity: Quite simply, who are you? Self-awareness is the cornerstone to emotional intelligence and so important that this one feature will do more for your success in life than any other social competency. If you know yourself well, you can choose a path aligned with your strengths and weaknesses. You will not get distracted by people, places and things that are not congruent with your true self.

How do you improve your self-awareness? Through working with your coach, doing assessments, examining your attitude, your passions, your self-image, examining your assumptions and beliefs and being willing to ask for and receive feedback.

Avoid defining yourself in terms of external things (job titles, education, family roles, etc.) and look at your personal integrity, ethics, and things that are important to you.

There are  a range of behaviour styles, leadership, team, values, wealth creation and personality type assessments available through your coach. Gaining a deeper understanding of your own preferred, natural way of behaving and thinking can greatly improve your understanding of yourself. As a side benefit, it also improves your understanding of others different from yourself. Ask your coach about the assessment tools they offer.

Here are some questions to ask yourself to gain clarity about your identity:

• When thinking about myself, what am I most proud of?
• How would my friends describe me?
• How would my co-workers describe me?
• What does my family say about me?
• What are the three most important areas in my personal life?
• How have I changed over my adult years?
• What are my strengths?
• What do I avoid or dislike doing?

2.            Define your values: What are your most fundamental beliefs? Identify three important moral values that are important to you. The more clearly defined your values are, the more energy and focus you will have for your goals. Values provide the basic structure you need to build your personal life, your career, your business and any other aspect of your life.

Consider your attitude towards other people. Think about your current obligations to your community, family and friends. Reflect on the core beliefs you have that you would want to pass on to the younger generation. If you were to mentor someone, what values would you project as being most important in the world?

Here are two exercises to help define your values. Look over the following list of values and rank each from 1 to 10 (with 1 representing values most important to you).  Be sure to add any that are important to you but not on this list.

Values Identification Exercise 1.0

What are the five values you ranked the highest? Those five values should be receiving 80% of your time and energy. Write down your five most important values on a separate sheet of paper and post them somewhere you will see them every day. This will drive your actions and keep you focused on what is most important.

Values Identification Exercise 2.0

Your highest values are nearly always reflected in how you spend your time. The things highest on your list inspire you to action. The things lowest on your list are where you find yourself procrastinating. _2.

Answer the following questions. Then list your top 3 things in order of importance.

• How do you fill the space where you live?
• What do you spend your time doing?
• What do you spend your money on?
• What do you think about and talk about?
• Where are you the most disciplined? _3.

 The values you have identified are the foundation of your success. They help you prioritise the goals you set for yourself. Without values clearly defined and prioritised, it is difficult to prioritise goals. This makes it easier to make a choice when commitments compete for your attention.

3.      Establish your goals: Goal setting is not easy. It is hard work requiring time and thought. It means soul searching. Fear of failure – and fear of success – can stop people from setting clear goals and interferes with the process of actually putting them into writing.

If you have completed steps one and two – you have examined your identity and clarified your values  –  then you have already done the hard work. The goal setting should be a natural extension of your values.

For example, if you value good health, then your goals of eating well and exercising regularly follow naturally. Focus on only three goals at a time, in order to be focused. Break each goal down to two or three components, along with specific, measurable, realistic time-frames..

D Worrall  (2010)

References:

Covey, S (1989 ) The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Simon & Shuster.

Worrall, D (2009) A Climate for Change, Life Success Publishing.

Demartini, J (2002) from Worrall D( 2009)  A Climate for Change, Life Success Publishing..

Resources

For more on goal setting, values and SMART goals see A Climate for Change (2009), D Worrall at www.aclimateforchangebook.com

For further information on Executive Coaching and Business Consulting for Leaders of Change, contact Di at Worrall Assoc. on enquiry@humanresourceschange.com.au

How do you make New Year’s Resolutions and goals that last the distance?

The first and most important question to ask yourself is: Do you have clearly defined written goals? Or are they just in your head? Research shows that those people who actually sit down and write out their goals not only end up achieving them, but have higher incomes and ratings for overall success and life satisfaction.

According to Brian Tracy in his book Goals!, there is a study that reveals just how effective written goals can be. Here is what Tracy reports:

Mark McCormack, in his book What They Don’t Teach You at Harvard Business School, tells of a Harvard study conducted between 1979 and 1989. In 1979, the graduates of the MBA program were asked, “Have you set clear, written goals for your future and made plans to accomplish them?” It turned out that only 3 percent of the graduates had written goals and plans. Thirteen percent had goals, but not in writing. Fully 84 percent had no specific goals at all.

Ten years later, in 1989, the researchers interviewed the members of that same class again. They found that the 13 percent who had goals that were not in writing were earning twice as much as the 84 percent of students who had no goals at all. And most surprisingly, they found that the 3 percent of graduates who had clear, written goals when they left Harvard were earning, on average, 10 times as much as the other 97 percent of graduates all together. The only difference between the groups was the clarity of the goals they had for themselves when they graduated.

Yes, you read that correctly. The 3 percent who had clear, written goals earned ten times as much as the 97 percent who didn’t have clear, written goals.

Brian Tracy, Mark McCormack, Zig Ziglar, Anthony Robbins, and many other motivational gurus have used various versions of this story. Almost all successful people have goals, and outstanding high achievers have clearly defined written goals. That said, how come so few people actually write out their goals?

Why Not Set Goals

There are four main reasons people don’t set clear goals and write them out. Many people say they can’t be bothered to take the time to sit and write them out, preferring to keep them in their heads. But no one is really that busy, as it only takes a few minutes. The real reasons are probably deeper, involving the fact that if they are kept in “the head,” it is easy to change, revise and ignore them. This avoids accountability issues and facing failure. Looking further into the psychological reasons, we find the following four factors:

1. First, most people don’t realize the importance of goals. If you grow up in a home where no one has goals or you socialise with a group where goals are neither discussed nor valued, you can very easily reach adulthood without knowing that your ability to set and achieve goals will have more of an effect on your life than any other skill. Look around you. How many of your friends or family members are clear and committed to their goals? Successful people are all committed to action plans. They set goals out in writing and follow them.
2. They don’t know how to set goals. Some people confuse goals with wishes and fantasies. They think in terms of “having a lot of money,” “getting a great job,” “having a nice family,” “getting fit,” without breaking these wishes down into their component parts and the action steps it would take. These aren’t goals but wishes and fantasies common to everyone. A goal is different. It is clear, specific and measurable. You know when you have achieved it or not.
3. They have a fear of failure. If goals aren’t written down, we can change them to match what is actually achieved without having to face any feelings of failure. Furthermore, many people make the mistake of setting goals that are easily attained in order to avoid failing. This is a form of unconscious self-sabotage. They end up going through life functioning at sub-optimal levels rather than at the level they are truly capable.
4. They have a fear of rejection. The fourth reason people don’t set clear, written goals, is that they fear they will be seen by others as ridiculous if they fail. They don’t want to face criticism be seen as not capable or worthy. This is one reason to keep goals confidential when you begin to start out with goal setting, other than sharing with your coach, mentor or a trusted peer.

3 Reasons Your Goals May not Work

Knowing the barriers to successful goal-setting, you are ready to learn how to set goals that will help you succeed and find the satisfaction you deserve. You may already have in mind three important goals for yourself that you’ve been wanting to achieve for a while. Go ahead and write them down now; save them for review later. Before you can set effective goals, however, you need to consider the three elements listed below:

There are four reasons why your goals may fail to inspire and motivate change_.

1. The goal isn’t aligned with your highest values— if the goal you set, is not aligned with your highest values, or is really something someone else thinks you should do, or, it may compete with other values you find more important.
2. Your goal isn’t specific—it’s too broad and overwhelming. While “getting fit” is admirable, it really isn’t a goal—rather the outcome of attaining the more specific goals of working out regularly, doing sports and eating less junk food.
3. Your goal isn’t supported—you don’t have a supportive environment to focus your intentions and reinforce your progress, like a coach or mentor to cheer you on in your little successes, or to help you come back after a setback.
4. Your goal is focused on what you don’t want— the subconscious is designed to do exactly as it is told, so a negative goal like “get out of debt” is more effectively replaced with a positive goal like” earn [specific $] by [specific date]. 

A Climate for Change (2009)  Di Worrall

Each of these elements must be carefully considered in creating goals that you can achieve. Once you have aligned your goals with your true identity, values and life purpose, you will find them easier to accomplish. The energy will flow, because the goals are an expression of your true self. Then, when you have written down your goals in a specific, clear, measurable way that is time-framed, the small steps along the way will become evident. This also keeps the energy flowing, and helps you to remain focused on the goal.

The best way to get support for your goals is from a coach. Friends and family members may be helpful, or not. A professionally trained coach is an expert at helping you to achieve what you want. He or she can also help you with the goal setting process to ensure that your goals are aligned with your values.

Di Worrall (2010)

Sources:

Cairo, J. (1998) Motivation and Goals: How to Set and Achieve Goals and Inspire Others. Career Press.

Tracy, B. (2003) Goals! How to Get Everything You Want —Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible. Berrett-Koehler.

Worrall, D (2009) A Climate for Change, Life Success Publishing.

Spend some time planning what you want 2010 to look like for you and your business with the help of an Executive Coach.   Book a Complimentary 30 minute Zero Cost “Jump Start 2010” Consultation now. 

Email enquiry@humanresourceschange.com.au or Tel 61 2 9599 6791

I asked Paula Jandey of Renaissance Tiles, one of my current small business clients to describe her experience:

What compelled you to seek out the services of a coach?

I felt the need for coaching due to an instability in the economy which as a consequence was flowing on to my business and my personal life as I wanted to have expert guidance on priorities and better management of all areas to ensure that I overcome these difficulties and regain the stability. I also had personal issues which I felt could be helped with guidance also.

 Where are you finding the most beneficial in our coaching relationship ?

• for your business

I am finding that a more solid concentration of priorities, closer scrutiny of the business, and having more confidence to make better decisions in certain key areas has been a benefit.

• for your personal/professional development

For me personally the benefit would have to be more confidence in myself to achieve what I want to achieve and strength to do it!.

What is it about my approach that you find most valuable?

I prefer your approach, firstly because you are a woman who strives for success as a woman. This factor is incredibly important to me, because you then can understand my goals and needs as a woman.  Secondly you have respect for everyone, and see the best in everyone…. As you say “Everyone was born perfect”….

We still have a few more places for our complimentary Business Breakthrough for 2010 coaching sessions for corporate professionals and business entrepreneurs.

Just call 02 9599 6791 or email di@humanresourceschange.com.au to book your session.

There are exceptions of course to the mood – Christmas car parking rage and the recent spate of thefts of money from banks and automatic tellers, of presents from under Christmas trees, and of Christmas lighting from our homes.

Another exception to the spirit of generosity is the harrowing story of my sister’s Christmas day experience.  A much loved family pet – her 14 year old black and white cat Toby was cornered and mauled by a pack of dogs in her front yard. Reported as husky-type dogs, they belong to a neighbour who moved into her street several doors down earlier that week. It was several days before the cat was found deceased from its wounds.

…The neighbour was approached by this loss and demonstrated no concern. 

My sister woke at dawn the morning after this bereavement to the same unrestrained, unmuzzled pack of four dogs at her back door attempting to break through into the house through the cat flap where her two remaining cats were hiding in terror. At her own risk, my sister drove the dogs out of her property and onto the street where she found the same neighbour waiting.

…The neighbour showed no concern about what had just occurred.

Further, the neighbour had chosen the cover of dawn to wander up and down the street disposing of her rubbish in neighbours bins as she had no further room in her own bin.  Further reports come in that the unrestrained dogs were attempting to enter the property of another neighbour whose small dog was cowering in their backyard. The police and local council were called.

…The neighbour showed no concern .

After exhausting the space in her the neighbours bins, the neighbour lit a bonfire in her backyard, complete with a mattress which produced a black, suffocating smoke across her neighbours yards. This time the fire brigade were called.

… Again, the neighbour could not understand what all the fuss was about. 

All of this occuring in the space of under a week.

Are these the actions of someone who is deliberately malevolent? Or is it a gross example of ignorance? An extreme case of someone who lives with the absence of empathy? Some of us do have this characteristic – a near complete inability to comprehend the consequences of our action or inaction on those around us.     

Many of us have new year’s resolutions. It’s a time to reflect on the past year and think about goal-setting for the coming year. While it’s great to have really big goals and dreams, what about the small ones? What a difference we could make if each of us took the resolution to consider – if only once – how our actions or comments might affect someone else and:

• Hold our road rage in just once
• Stand up in the bus or train for someone who looks like they need the seat more than us
• Say hi to that neighbour we’ve never spoken to, next time we see them
• Go out of our way to give a someone a compliment
• Not park in that disabled spot
• Think twice before firing a staff member in 2009 due to “poor economic conditions”.

It’s like that movie with Gwyneth Paltrow - Sliding doors. Our life is a consequence of the decisions we make and the paths we take. What could happen if we made a conscious decision to refrain from our own interests, and instead Love Thy Neighbour in 2009 by speaking or acting in a way which has a positive effect  (or prevents a negative effect) on someone else – if only just once.

Di Worrall is an author, social commentator and change management consultant. For a FREE subscription to the newsletter – Creating a Climate for Change click on the following website  http://www.worrallassociates.com.au/

Get a FREE chapter of Di’s new book – A Climate for Change on

http://www.aclimateforchangebook.com/

I’ve often read that clearing the physical clutter lying around your house or your office is a really important part of clearing your head in preparation for new plans and goals – like the ones you set for the new year.  You can’t really put new goals on top of old distractions, else the old distractions will keep sabotaging your efforts to focus on the new direction. It’s important to make a space first.

The concept of clearing a space in your head reminds me of the story about the martial arts instructor who was approached by a novice for advanced training. The instructor wasn’t about to take just anybody into his classes. He observed the novice and his techniques for some time and then posed the following dilemma. He advised the novice that the only way that he could learn from the master was to give something up. He used the analogy of a glass of water. A glass which is full has no further capacity. If the novice was unwilling to give up some of his notions of the martial arts, it would be like tipping out some of that water. Only then would the novice be open to learning new things from the master.

Once a space is created, it operates like a vacuum. A vacuum is a space which is compelled to be filled with something. Here’s what I mean.  Let’s say I have a goal of acquiring a new lounge suite at the beginning of the year, yet I don’t seem to get around to it after a few months. If I take action to remove the existing lounge suite in garage sale, I then create a vacuum-like space in my lounge room.  Now the compulsion to replace the lounge with a different one becomes overwhelming because the household still wants to use the lounge-room every day. With this day to day reminder,   it won’t be long before the vacant space in  my lounge room is filled with a different lounge suite. 

Garage sale …here we come.

Click the following link for your FREE subscription to Di Worrall’s newsletter  - Creating a Climate for Change  http://www.worrallassociates.com.au/